by Rob "Biggs" Baden

Kelly just looked over at the captain with his mouth wide open. "You want it going where?"

"Tatooine," said Ru'kaart, his hands behind his back. "It's a bit of an important shipment, but nothing to have too much security about. Just need someone to escort it there and escort another shipment back. Normally it would be assigned to another unit not on the frontlines, but things have been a little quiet of late and Command felt that some of your pilots could use a bit of leave."

"True, we have been hitting it hard until recently. Anyone you feel in particular could be up to it?"

"Well," responded the captain, "Colonel Nosnern could use some leave, so she'll go along as the unofficial leader of the pack. Also, I understand that Mr. Baden and Mr. Wetherill have seen a bit of action in their patrols."

Kelly nodded. "Understood. I'll inform them to report to the departing shuttle by twenty-one hundred."

Jamie almost kicked the shuttle ramp down as it descended, eager to get out of the small metal box and onto an actual planet. Carrying his duffle-bag over his shoulder he stopped at the base of the ramp and inhaled the air. "Oh, that smells good."

"You have got to be kidding me," said Rob as he walked down beside him. "The last time Chelsey and I were here we nearly got killed."

"It wasn't that bad, Biggs," chimed in a cheery Chelsey. "Besides, we did get to hear some good music."

Elise Nosnern gave a smile, something she rarely did. "Ah! Tatooine smells good after snow!"

"Colonel, the last place you were stationed with snow was Hoth, that was nearly two years ago."

"Yes, it was, but I can still feel the cold!"

Jamie just shook his head and started walking towards they rest of Mos Eisley. He noticed a group of people wearing stormtrooper chest armor and helmets with light armor on their arms and legs, blaster rifles in a standard guard position. "Hey, who are those people?"

"Them? They're probably part of the new police force that the Tatooine government is trying to establish. I wouldn't worry too much about them, but I would keep out of their way."

The small quartet of people walked past the armed people and Jamie could have sworn he heard one of them say, "You know this Stormtrooper armor just does nothing for me!" His speculation was confirmed when he heard another say, "shut up, it's not as if you've got a body worth showing to begin with."

"Some how I feel this is going to turn into another bad visit on Tatooine," muttered Rob behind him."

"Biggs, for once, shut up and lose the stoicism," said Nosnern. "It gets annoying."

Rob almost punched the guy in the street once he got to the hotel. He'd been to various places in his time with the New Republic, but never had he seen an old man standing in the street yelling at the top of his longs, "We can't stop Judgement Day, we just have to survive it..."

"Don't mind him," said the hotel manager, "he's just some crazy old man who likes to talk about the end of the world." She gave Jamie the once over and smiled in his direction. "My, my, my, what a handsome pilot you are. Is that a lekku, or are you happy to see me?"

Rob blinked and looked over to Jamie; his companions face was very red. "Uh, thanks, but can we just have the key to our rooms?"

She sighed and gave them four keys to each of their rooms. "Oh, and if you ever want any company, handsome, just call for me."

Rob just shook his head. "I keep telling you, Tatooine is not the best place to be. It's nothing but a dustball. Nothing good came of this world."

"Ahem!" sputtered Jamie.

"Okay, okay, so one man who turns out to be the best pilot in the galaxy as well as the forefront of a new Jedi army came from Tatooine, but I stand by my previous point."

"And on that note, let's find the bar."

Rob shook his head and headed to the tavern adjacent to the hotel. As he walked through the doors he noticed that the walls had been completely replaced and painted since the last time he was in the Grand Tatooine Emporium; of course, the last time he was here someone had blown out the wall in order to capture someone. Not exactly the best way to start out an evening of song and food.

But, that was in the past, and this was now. The four of them sat down at an empty table. Rob noticed a group of ex-Imperials - by the way their uniforms were degrading - sitting a few tables over, arguing about something to do with the late Emperor.

"I keep telling you, he smelled really bad; I was part of his staff for a few months, the man always had this stink about him," said one of them.

"Nonsense!" commented another. "He had a great smell about him. I loved the smell of Palpie's armpits in the morning... it smelt like victory!"

"Are you out of your mind? 'He smelt like victory'? You've lost it."

Rob just shook his head again and turned to address the Twi'lek waitress. "Oh, I'd like something strong, please, and make that with ice."

"So you want a fo shizzle?"

"A what-tizzle?"

"Fo shizzle, it's the strongest drink we have."

"Sure, sure, fo shizzle, neptizzle, whatever."

She hurried off for their orders and Rob just sat there, sighing a little.

Jamie looked over at Rob and couldn't believe how drunk he was. In the two hours since he first ordered his drink he'd gotten several refills of this fo shizzle. Each refill he got seemed to make him even more intoxicated, and Rob was not exactly a quiet drunk.

Downing another glass of the blue drink, Rob wiped his mouth and give a loud "ah!". "Great taste! Less filling!" He swirled his glass around with his hand. "Even greater taste... oh did I already say that? Heh heh!"

Jamie just sighed.

Nosnern leaned in. "Does he do this on a regular basis?"

"Actually, Colonel, I believe this is the first time he's ever been drunk that I know of. He is usually very moderate with his drinking."

"Well, he's failed today."

"Hey!" shouted Rob. "I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work. Heh heh!"

Jamie slaps his hand against his forehead. "And I've got to fly with this guy."

"Well, I think he'll be okay once we get back to the Star. We better just put him to bed." She got up and approached Rob. "Lieutenant! I think it's time to go to bed."

"Ah, stuff it!"

Without missing a heartbeat, Nosnern punched Rob in the face with her right hand, knocking him back and out of his chair; also effectively knocking him out cold. "There, that's a simple solution. Help me with him."

Jamie and Chelsey got up from their seats, a little stunned, and helped to left Rob off the floor and carry him to his room. "Ugh, he's heavy. He needs to go on a diet."

Rob kept rubbing his temples, the hangover intesifying as the shuttle set down on the Morning Star's deck plates. He'd never drunk so much in all his life, and the last thing he wanted to see was that sparkling blue drink called fo shizzle.

The disembarkment light flashed on and he got upñslowlyñand headed to the ramp. As he walked down the ramp he noticed the crews taking out the crate that they had brought back with them. "Hey, just what is in that anyways?"

"This?" said one of the crew. "It's fibers and materials for making uniforms."

"Uniforms!?"

Jamie smiled at him. "Hey, who knows, perhaps we can even get new uniforms. I know, let Vape design the new Squadron uniform!"

"Yeah," said Chelsey, "I've already got a great color scheme: blue with sparkles, just like that fo shizzle drink."

Rob brought his hand to his mouth and covered it quickly. "Excuse me!" he managed as he ran for the nearest refresher. All he could heard was the sound of laughter as he rushed to the small room before his strength gave out. Tatooine! I hate Tatooine!.

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